I like the whole effect on the story. Please write part 2.
I'm also the author of Dream Come True. Please check it out. I don't have many people commenting.
Aug 30, 2011 Rating
:) :( by: Anonymous
I love the story!! But if you want to be more realistic, you can't just say, She couldn't wait to get on riding, if i were her, I wouldn't care about horses at the moment, their her parents! HER LIFE!
Aug 30, 2011 Rating
Ok story but confusing by: Doree
ur story so far is pretty good but i don't get how she can be excited just after hearing her parents death? maybe it's just me but i'd be sobbing and not caring about riding (i'm as horse crazy as one can be but if my parents died i'd be upset, angry, horrified and completely sad, no matter if i could ride) for me it doesn't make sense, i mean i get it if riding makes her feel better later on but right after the news!? sorry if i'm being a bit rude about it but i enjoy getting criticism about my stories, it helps me become a better writer so i thought i could give some to others. also add a bit more info about the girl, her looks ect. put part 2 on soon!
