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by Destiny
(TX)

(TX )

Have you ever felt as though you were going to burst with excitement? I felt just like that, when finally on my 11th birthday Dad said he'd bring me to a horse auction to look at some horses for buying. My name is Destiny Grace and I have never had a horse, but I absolutely love horses!

We just moved here in Wyoming from New, York. We moved from the city life to the country life, so Dad said when I was eleven and we moved, I could get a horse! The car suddenly jolted I was almost thrown forward with my thoughts. “My jivies, this country road feels like were popcorn in a pan!” Dad said laughing his jolly laugh. “I think the road told us that Jack!” Mom said laughing too.

Mom was a country girl, and Dad was a city boy, he never wanted me to have a horse, but Mom talked him into it after eleven years! Dad is REALLY funny, and Jolly! Finally after it seemed like forever we reached the auction. “Why don’t we look at some of the horses before the auction starts?” Dad said looking at his watch.

As I slowly passed the thousands (Ok, not thousands!) of horse panels and horses, I sighed. Then three horses caught my attention. They were clearly Arabian’s, but hard to believe that they were even horses. They huddled together like it was freezing; they were skinny, with their ribs showing, and their bones poking out of their skin, their hoofs badly needed trimming. There was a bay, a black, and a grey.

Their coats were dull, and clearly looked like they had been on rough pasture, with little grass, and with barb wire fences. The bay looked at me and nickered slowly, its eye’s looking longingly at me. Then Dad approached me as I slowly walked past their pen. “Hurry, it’s about to start!”

We walked into to a huge building with at least hundred long lines of cement steps used as seats, and then at the front was half of an arena with a stand for the auctioneers to sit and call out the prices. We sat down as one by one; the horses were called out and sold. I looked through window, it was getting dark. I sighed sadly. It wasn't in my hands if we got a horse or not.

As the end slowly passed, horses came in and out… But none were to my taste or Dad’s “Look at those three” my father said with suspicious enthusiasm. “I saw those in one of the pens, I actually am attracted to them!” My Mother shook her head “Those? Those are skinny, and have no shine and...” Mom voice was interrupted by a man’s voice “look at those bag of bones” a man laughed mockingly “These are pure bred Arabian’s, with a royal bloodline” said the auctioneer.

Then I heard a chorus of laughter “And they will stay, together forever!” said the auctioneer loudly.

“Dad, what about those three horses?” I asked intently watching their behavior “You sure?” he asked “Yes!” Dad put his hand up and yelled “100”. “Jack!” Mom whispered in a screeching tone “Are you sure about those?” She asked with a concerned tone “Anyone else wants to bid on these, horses?” the auctioneer asked. I heard only a few mumbles. “1oo, going once…Twice… and SOLD to number 30!”

I jumped up with Dad and we ran to were the horses were located. I put the halters on the horses; they fidgeted when the owner approached them. “ They are broken and tamed already.” The man grumbled. Dad gave the man the check. And we walked towards the trailer

When we got home Dad went to the tack shop to buy some tack and horse accessories. I gently stroked and brushed the horses as they ate there hay hungrily. “Well Grace, what shall we call them?” asked my Mom. “Why don’t we figure that one out in about a week, so I’ll know their personalities?” I asked. “That’s a great idea”.

After two weeks, Mom and I had washed each horse and conditioned it, shined it, and every day we groomed them, fed them, gave them attention, and trained them. Every day they looked healthier and healthier, till they almost looked normal.

After a week I came up with three names, for the bay horse , which is a female I called, Atiff, in Arab that means compassionate, affectionate, and loving, for the grey, I named her Jameela, which means,Beautiful, graceful, and lovely, The black horse, which is a male I named Asmin, which means, Protector, and defender.

Asmin totally follows his name; I named him that from one incident that happened. A dog was attempting to run after Jameela and Atiff, when Asmin saw that, he ran with all his might after the dog, and after that I never saw that dog again!

After a week or two, after they got settled in, we took them to the vet for dewormer, etc, and also we went to the Ferrier to trim each of their hoofs. Every day that summer I took care and tamed, and trained them. By the time summer was ending I was able to ride Atiff and Jameela bareback! Asmin was still in training.

On the last day of summer, I had happened to be gone at school, and Mom was in the house baking cookies, when she looked out the window and saw that only Jameela and Asmin. She thought “That horse is as curious as a kitten; she’s just probably hiding or something.” But a loud shrill of a horse broke into her thought’s. She ran as fast as she could towards the sound. She followed the shrills of the horse all the way down by our creek.

Gladly Mom had her phone, and called the vet and me. Though the vet was late to help with the arrival, the baby was delivered, and was very healthy. The young filly was light tan, with a white tail and mane with golden strands of hair in her mane and tail. The young filly tried to get up, but it wobbled and fell over. Atiff moved closer to help the young filly with support.

“Why don’t we keep this little one a secret?” My mother said smiling “I hope I can, why don’t we bake a cake to pass the time, of anxiety to tell the new secret!” I asked enthusiastically “That’s a great idea, and remember we now have find a suitable name for, well, is it a he or she?!” My mother asked the vet “A she” “Isn’t she likes a light Palomino or tan, I have heard that babies “change” colors when they get older?” I asked wonderingly “its palomino, but most likely it will turn into a darker color. She is a fairly attractive young filly.” The vet answered solemnly

Mom and I talked about the new foal and made the cake also, it seemed like years before Dad got home. When he did he said it was time to feed. Mom and I tried to hide back the huge smiles that might peek out. When we got in the barn, the little filly nickered, and poked his head over the stall door. “Huh?” Dad looked confused. I could hold it no longer “Atiff gave birth to a filly!”I said smiling “Oh, not another!” Dad answered laughing “Before a year we can start a business for selling foals!”

We all laughed “Have we named her yet?”He asked peering into the stall “No, not yet, but how about Buhayasah for she walks with pride or Buhtha because she is happy and delighted when she see’s others?” I said laughing as the little filly pranced, with its tail straight up in the air. Then it squealed as Asmin walked in the barn. “Oops forgot to shut the door” My Mom said hurrying to lead Asmin out of the barn.

Comments for Read and PLEASE comment! (I don't have a title yet)

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Nov 06, 2011
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:)
by: lucinda

i have a good idea someone should steal the fily because the vet did say that she was a good one didn't she?

Sep 04, 2011
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This is CUTE!
by: Shine

This is so cute! thanks for starting such a wonderful story!

Jun 20, 2011
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Love it!
by: Anonymous

That's such a magical story! It's so sweet!

May 26, 2011
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LOL! @Bec
by: Auther

LOL!! Well, I'm writing another story, right now, I was talking about in my story that your reading right now, some of the chapters stories are real! Lol! But if you want a lot more of the story, right now, you can e-mail me at horsequestions101@gmail, and just ask for some recent chapters! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR COMMENTING!!

May 24, 2011
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Ok
by: Bec

Ok I see so it's not true you said some are... where are they? I WANT TO READ THEM!!!! :) ;)

May 23, 2011
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THanks!
by: Author

Oh yeah, check out my page under "your page" Horse-lovers page! Thanks!

May 23, 2011
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Thank you!!
by: Auther of this story

@True&Unicorn: Thank you soooo much!!

@True: No, but some of the stories are!

@Unicorn: I really wanted to know what people thought I should change, and what they loved! I will try to put those different things in my story like you demonstrated!! Well, my story is kinda about all the horses, not just the filly, I will probably put some ?Action?, where something happens to one of the horses, but right now it's really about them all. (The next chapter will be more about Grace then the horses, just to let you get to know about her more) But thank you sooo much! I am still thinking about the story's name, but the next chapter I will just call it the same but say chapter 2...

@All: I was wondering if you though my first chapter was to long?

May 21, 2011
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Hi Destiny
by: Unicorn

Brilliant story! All round, it's good, very good. The plot is good, the characters stand out in my mind. I like the fact that even though her father has opposed her wishes for a horse, Grace harbors no grudge. I like the horses' characters too, and especially their names (Jameela is very nice).
I would like you to engage the senses a bit more - use all five the senses when you write. Touch, taste, smell, sight, and hearing. Taste is a tricky one, but it's fun to experiment with. If you engage the senses, it'll add a lot of power to the story. Coupled with interesting comparisons (similes and metaphors), sensory descriptions can turn a story inside out.
For example, consider the following two passages:
"Jameela trotted over to me."
And:
"Jameela moved towards me in her flowing trot, the wind brushing her mane with tender fingers [touch image]. Her hooves beat a quiet tango on the summer grass [hearing image], muscles sliding like ripples on a pool of quicksilver [visual image and simile]." Much more powerful, isn't it?
You have a very strong story here. Many of the story elements are in place, you've grabbed my attention, and I love the characters. Please, pretty please, write on! And have fun.
Unicorn
P. S. This might have already been used, but the Arabian horses' origin has so much influence on the story, why don't you name it "Arabian Dreams"? Or "Arabian Princess" if the story is about Atiff's foal?

May 20, 2011
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True
by: Bec

Is that a true story? Wow,amazing true or not!!!!:)

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